Tuesday, 3 April 2012

The Truth

Here's me, on a hike trying to lose the weight. Doris was with Andre as was Kaitlynne, Graham and Ian. Sharren and Darren were out with their buddies. I seem happy in this photo, but I was wracked with guilt. 

I never knew how to say it to Andre. I love him so much, I didn't ever mean to hurt him and he has done so much... but I couldn't live a lie. I had been having an affair with an English man called Shane Robyn and   he is the real father to my four beautiful children, Ian, Kaitlynne, Graham and Doris. In my last post you will notice the stark diffarence between Sharren and Darren's looks compared to Ian, Kaitlynne, Graham and Doris'. 

Andre is mexican-american. That shows in the twins. But Ian, Kaitlynne, Graham and Doris are all blonde. I knew when I spoke to Shane when I was pregnant with Ian and he said it was his. I disagreed, but he was right. Why I kept on going with him I don't know. Andre thinks thought they were all his. But they were Shane's. 

Shane doesn't see Ian, Kate, Gram and Dor. He doesn't want to. After 11 years, I finalyl reliased he was just wid me for the sex. But Andre was with me longterm, I couldnt believe how stupid i had been. When I told Andre he flipped out. He said, "You bitch. I never knew that that was true. You've lied." 

And I had. 

I hated myself for so many years, but time grows on. People grown on. And although I will never forgive myself, I have met a wonderful man via Zoosk.com called Gregory and we are enjoying eachothers company and other cheeky things ;) 

Sorry Andre. If you are reading this. 

Sorry kids. 

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